to my best friend and cousin..

HAPPY 15th BIRTHDAY CONTY!!

2006. When we were young and innocent. Hah

I know I already wished you; and that's all I did and can do for now, so I've decided to dedicate this post to you. :)

We grew up together; I guess we've known each other for our whole lives. I still remember those times we used to hang out; me, Stv, you and Abel and do all the weird stuff. We used to go to the Stadium to play tennis but ended up picking balls up instead. We went places together; church camps, outings, sleepovers and crashing each other's houses.. I was so glad when we moved to live just a row away from you. Though you're 4 years younger than me, I never really felt like we had any gap in between us at all. We had our arguments here and there; we did cry over things as girls do. But those aren't the memories that live on; it's all the great ones we've had that continues to play in my mind. We were more like sisters since we only have brothers and yeah, I was really glad having you around..

Then things started to change, and it came to a point where it started to hurt us both. To realize that we were drifting apart. It was hard for me, that whole period and I know it was for you too. But I'm glad that after some time, it started getting better. Things didn't get back to the way it was before and to tell you the truth, sometimes I still wish it did. But I'm seeing now that not everything can go back to the way it used to be, however, it doesn't make it any different. We're still cousins, sisters, best friends :). And that's one thing that won't change, I promise you. I don't ever want to lose you either.

I hope you'll cherish those times like I did. Thanks for standing by me all this while; always being there for me.. You've always had my best interests at heart and I'm really sorry for all the things that happened in the past; the words I've said and things I did... You always were so forgiving and loving.. And you were always there.. You say you can't help me sometimes, but really, just listening is more than enough and I'm glad for all you've done for me... Truly grateful!

I'm so happy to see how much you've grown over the years and I'm proud of you!! Do know I'm always gonna be here for you and you can count on me. We can't expect things to be like before; but it doesn't mean we're any further apart... I miss you. =/.

Continue to be strong in the Lord.. Hold on and never let go! And remember, I'm here too! Love you loads!! :)

2009

p.s: We shall go out when I'm back!!

some things don't change

I am sorry; I really am..

I know you won't see this, but I guess it makes me feel better to just let this out...

When I look back at the past; I still remember all the tears I cried; all the hard times we went through. All the pain I bore; all the weight I used to carry. You blamed me for carrying it alone; but I knew that with your help; the pain would be even harder to bear. And so I tried..

You never seemed to understand how much I care. You never did really thank me for the things I did. Sometimes I wonder if it was even worth it; giving so much yet never getting anything back. And when you spoke those words; I felt as if everything was just a lie. It all came to nothing.

You told me you needed time and soon enough we got over it. I got over the hurts; you got over your anger.. And things slowly began to fall back into place; nothing hindered us from being friends again. I simply loved the feeling; that I no longer needed to be afraid; I no longer needed to worry how things would be.

We never kept in contact much ever since things changed; but still I was grateful it was no longer strained. Maybe my feelings have changed; I realize you weren't the one I really wanted.. But if there's one thing that didn't change; it's how important you are to me. I cannot deny that you were one of my closest friends; one whom I really cared about and perhaps cared for me..

I still think of you sometimes. I still miss the times where we used to be so close. It won't be that difficult to get back to those times; but maybe our different lives are drifting us apart.. It's sad when I think of it sometimes..

I do love you; not in that sense; but I do care for you so much more than you know. Please remember that I'll always be here for you; no matter what happens. I can still be the friend you lean on; if you'd only let me; especially now when you need someone to be there.. But maybe things have changed too much.

I'm not too far away. :)

belated birthday post

Happy Belated Birthday Joyce Tan!!! (Nov 14)

Sorry this came in so late.

I hope you had a great one....

I'm grateful that God has blessed me with a wise, smart, great friend like you....

I seriously miss those times we use to chat on the phone; which was like 2-3 years ago. Then after you shifted we seldom talked on on the phone but we still messaged rather frequently. You were always one of my closer friends in school. And I was kinda sad when your batch left. I'm honestly surprised that we're still pretty close even though we might not contact as much or even see each other; but you've always been there and I am here too...

Thanks for all the advice you've given me. You're such a blessing. You're very special and unique and I know God has great plans for your life. Hope you would continue to grow and trust Him in all things. He will carry you through even in the moments where you feel you can't go on; know that He can. May this year be a fruitful one both in your studies and in your spiritual life... Continue to shine for Him.

I love you sis in Christ =).

rachel

A pic we took in 2007 during Christmas

Rachel left for UK yesterday. She's one of the very few best friends I have and knowing that she's left is quite hard for me to accept. Didn't realize how fast time passed till then..

I knew her in youth since I was form 3. And it was only in form 4 that we started getting closer, she was form 5 then. I remember hanging out with her in school and even in youth. We shared many things and she was one whom I trusted. Because of something that happened, I stopped confiding in her for a few months; due to several reasons. But it was after those months that we started getting much closer again. When she left school, I was quite sad due to the fact I had one less good friend to hang out with in school. Somehow, we still managed to keep in touch and were still very close friends. Up till now and hopefully it won't change despite her being so far away now.

She was the one I texted the most; talked to the most, told the most stories to, shared the most with. Things just won't be the same anymore, but I'm glad that she managed to get a place in Imperial and she will surely do well.

If you ever read this, I hope you'll know that I treasure our friendship alot and I'm so grateful to have a good friend like you. Hope to see you in December if you're coming back and hope we can still keep in touch often. And yeah, God has a great plan for you; allow Him to use you for His purpose and you'll see the great things ahead. =). And, you're special. Thanks again for always listening to what I have to say, and never once got tired of it... You'll be in my prayers. Love you sis in Christ. =)

thank you

Happy Birthday Jane!


I don't usually do any birthday dedications, so here's one for you. =)

I just realized we've never really taken a picture together, except for this that you edited.


Anyway, take this as your present for the time being. Haha.

I've always known you as my brother's friend's sister and it was the same for you. And yeah, you were also the 'behind door neighbour'. Haha. Our brothers used to communicate through their room windows. I really didn't know then that we would end up being close friends too.

I only got to know you much better last year through CF, camps and stuff like that. You were one of the closest friends I had who were younger than me.

I've seen you grow spiritually and I'm so glad that God has brought about such a big change in you. Don't let this faith die, but continue to hold on to Him no matter what happens.

Thanks for everything you've said and done. I remember the times where I used to call you and just pour out everything and it was the same for you. All the tears that were shed over the phone. Haha.. We've really grown and changed much don't you think. And I believe God had a purpose for allowing us to go through what we went through, that we would be able to help and comfort one another because of it. I really don't know what would have happened if I didn't have such a friend like you.. Especially last year when it happened, you were there for me.. Even though I couldn't say much, you still understood..

Though we might not talk as much as we used to, you're still one of my closest friends and I really appreciate our friendship. Look to God always... And I'll be here too if you need me. God bless you, sis in Christ. =)