Been staying up pretty late these past two weeks. Earliest bed time at 2. Have had lots to do but this craziness is about to end. 2 more final papers, 1 more day of classes and I'm done with freshman year.
Leaving for NY on Thursday for a much needed break, coming back to campus on Monday by which most, if not all students will be gone. I have to mention I'm leaving during finals precisely because none of my classes have sit-in final exams. I am grateful indeed.
RA training from 1st of May to the 3rd and on the 4th, I'll be on my way home. :).
My last Sunday at church was amazing. I have been blessed with such a great church family back home and here as well.. I've been going to the church for the past 3 months and I have received tremendous support and love and I cannot thank Him enough. Definitely going to miss everyone there but I'm looking forward to worshiping in my own church back home :)
Blog soon, I hope.
You are my strength.
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
Wednesday, April 11, 2012
2 months since
I will not forget that day
He did something in my heart, opened my eyes
And now here I am
It has grown - stronger.
I don't know what lies ahead but I continue to hope -
My hope is in Him and Him alone.
He will work things out, in His time, in His way
I just need to trust
But whatever it may be, I am grateful
For everything
I will not forget that day
He did something in my heart, opened my eyes
And now here I am
It has grown - stronger.
I don't know what lies ahead but I continue to hope -
My hope is in Him and Him alone.
He will work things out, in His time, in His way
I just need to trust
But whatever it may be, I am grateful
For everything
Sunday, April 8, 2012
Reflections on Easter and His Faithfulness
I posted this last Easter. It's really interesting because the commercialism of Easter is even stronger here.
The irony is that being a Christian nation, or rather, a post-Christian nation, Easter, just like Christmas has become a cultural holiday and celebration. But rather than the message of the Cross being the main event, Easter bunnies and Easter eggs and whatnot have become the symbols of the celebration. I have no idea how it happened and this isn't the point of the post. And yes, while some non-Christians do go to church on this day, the real meaning of Easter - His death and resurrection is only known and understood by Christians. I might be wrong but this is once again, just my opinion.
Whereas back home, only Christians celebrate the event and understand its meaning... People from other religions might be ignorant but are always told by the Christians the significance of the day.
But it is most sad when we ourselves do not think about it. When we take it for granted. I don't believe in celebrating His death and resurrection only one day in a year. We need to ponder on it, thank Him for it every single day of our lives. Why?
Because His death and resurrection is the only reason we can truly live.
1 Peter 2:24
He himself bore our sins in his body on the tree, so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness; by his wounds you have been healed.
Ephesians 2:4-5
But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions--it is by grace you have been saved.
Who can comprehend the extend of His love and mercy? No matter how hard we try, His love is unfathomable. It goes beyond reason, it goes against the law of nature.
But He does not require us to understanding but to trust. To accept His love and walk on in this new life. That we may say, as He did 'Not my will but Yours be done'. He paid the greatest price - nothing we give to the Lord will make up for that. But that does not mean we do not give. We give because we love Him. We love Him because He first loved us.
That being said, I had a very good Easter celebration. Went down with the gospel choir to a church down at Lowell, the same one where we attended the Worship Conference last fall. It was interesting as they had 7 speakers who had 7 minutes each to speak about Jesus' sayings on the Cross. We were invited to perform a song.
Easter Service on Sunday at the church I've been attending regularly, how I found and decided to go to this church is a miracle in itself - He works. Was invited over by the Pastor's wife to their house for lunch and it was a very blessed time. They had 6 sons and for some reason, despite the many differences in character and family traits, it reminded me of my own. The grandparents were there too, having all generations together to celebrate a very important Day was just great. I think it was the first time I actually celebrated Easter with 'family' because all along in the past, it was just going to Church.
But more than anything, I am realizing how much God has blessed me. How He has been faithful. I came across a post in the past:
"There are many uncertainties; questions about what if I don't maintain the required CGPA to keep my merit scholarship, funding and settling down, finding the right church etc. Whatever they may be, I choose not to allow it to bother me, but that they may lead me back to Him. It's all in His hands. If He led me to it, He will lead me through it. He's a faithful God, no doubt about that."
I posted this on April 28 last year when I made my decision to attend Colby-Sawyer. And whats amazing is that
1) I didn't just maintain the required GPA, I excelled, far beyond my own expectations. And I only have Him to give glory to.
2) I settled down well with His provision and bringing various people to me who have been such a blessing... I could not ask for more.
3) He provided me with not just one but two jobs when I was doubtful of even securing one. And most recently, I was selected out of the many applicants and few positions available, to be a Resident Assistant for next year. Which is what I love to do, being in contact with people and it will ease my family a lot financially. And this is all His doing - not mine.
4) As I mentioned earlier, I've been attending the Andover Congregational Church. I never envisioned myself to attend a church so different in terms of the order of worship and running of the service, from what I was raised up in. Yet the first time I walked in that church, God showed me different signs and confirmed that there was where He wants me to be, at least for now. Because it is never about the denomination nor the practice, it is Him.
I can go on and on.... But the main point is to show that God is indeed faithful and we can trust Him. He knows what we need, when we need it and how we need it...
Thank You Lord, thank You... You are the Giver, You are the Gift - the greatest Gift of all...
The irony is that being a Christian nation, or rather, a post-Christian nation, Easter, just like Christmas has become a cultural holiday and celebration. But rather than the message of the Cross being the main event, Easter bunnies and Easter eggs and whatnot have become the symbols of the celebration. I have no idea how it happened and this isn't the point of the post. And yes, while some non-Christians do go to church on this day, the real meaning of Easter - His death and resurrection is only known and understood by Christians. I might be wrong but this is once again, just my opinion.
Whereas back home, only Christians celebrate the event and understand its meaning... People from other religions might be ignorant but are always told by the Christians the significance of the day.
But it is most sad when we ourselves do not think about it. When we take it for granted. I don't believe in celebrating His death and resurrection only one day in a year. We need to ponder on it, thank Him for it every single day of our lives. Why?
Because His death and resurrection is the only reason we can truly live.
1 Peter 2:24
He himself bore our sins in his body on the tree, so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness; by his wounds you have been healed.
Ephesians 2:4-5
But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions--it is by grace you have been saved.
Who can comprehend the extend of His love and mercy? No matter how hard we try, His love is unfathomable. It goes beyond reason, it goes against the law of nature.
But He does not require us to understanding but to trust. To accept His love and walk on in this new life. That we may say, as He did 'Not my will but Yours be done'. He paid the greatest price - nothing we give to the Lord will make up for that. But that does not mean we do not give. We give because we love Him. We love Him because He first loved us.
That being said, I had a very good Easter celebration. Went down with the gospel choir to a church down at Lowell, the same one where we attended the Worship Conference last fall. It was interesting as they had 7 speakers who had 7 minutes each to speak about Jesus' sayings on the Cross. We were invited to perform a song.
Easter Service on Sunday at the church I've been attending regularly, how I found and decided to go to this church is a miracle in itself - He works. Was invited over by the Pastor's wife to their house for lunch and it was a very blessed time. They had 6 sons and for some reason, despite the many differences in character and family traits, it reminded me of my own. The grandparents were there too, having all generations together to celebrate a very important Day was just great. I think it was the first time I actually celebrated Easter with 'family' because all along in the past, it was just going to Church.
But more than anything, I am realizing how much God has blessed me. How He has been faithful. I came across a post in the past:
"There are many uncertainties; questions about what if I don't maintain the required CGPA to keep my merit scholarship, funding and settling down, finding the right church etc. Whatever they may be, I choose not to allow it to bother me, but that they may lead me back to Him. It's all in His hands. If He led me to it, He will lead me through it. He's a faithful God, no doubt about that."
I posted this on April 28 last year when I made my decision to attend Colby-Sawyer. And whats amazing is that
1) I didn't just maintain the required GPA, I excelled, far beyond my own expectations. And I only have Him to give glory to.
2) I settled down well with His provision and bringing various people to me who have been such a blessing... I could not ask for more.
3) He provided me with not just one but two jobs when I was doubtful of even securing one. And most recently, I was selected out of the many applicants and few positions available, to be a Resident Assistant for next year. Which is what I love to do, being in contact with people and it will ease my family a lot financially. And this is all His doing - not mine.
4) As I mentioned earlier, I've been attending the Andover Congregational Church. I never envisioned myself to attend a church so different in terms of the order of worship and running of the service, from what I was raised up in. Yet the first time I walked in that church, God showed me different signs and confirmed that there was where He wants me to be, at least for now. Because it is never about the denomination nor the practice, it is Him.
I can go on and on.... But the main point is to show that God is indeed faithful and we can trust Him. He knows what we need, when we need it and how we need it...
Thank You Lord, thank You... You are the Giver, You are the Gift - the greatest Gift of all...
Thursday, March 29, 2012
He's real
I've been away from my blog for so long that it's always hard to know where to begin. I guess 2 weeks isn't really that long but the fact that I've been so inconsistent in updating makes it even harder. But I will try.
Only a month left of school... The year's wrapping up quickly and this semester seems to be going by faster. Which also means I'm getting busier - its the time of the year, presentations, papers, more papers, exams, meetings, activities and the list goes on. Yet I'm still managing to find time in between to rest and I am utterly grateful. He doesn't want me to get lost in all of this but to continually draw strength from His presence and because of that, I am refreshed. I cannot speak enough of how wonderful it is to go about the day with the knowledge that He goes before me and holds me by the right hand. The reality of His promise is being realized as I grow closer and closer to Him.
It hasn't been an easy time for me, more so for the people I love. Benny, the Navs staff in our Christian Fellowship whom has become a really good friend and a spiritual mentor to me; we meet weekly to talk about what God has been doing and teaching us and pray together... I thoroughly enjoy our conversations and just learning from each other... Cindy, his wife is also close, I work under her in the International Students Office. They have been such an encouragement and blessing and I am so grateful for their presence in my life... Benny was admitted to the hospital last week and underwent a major surgery on Tuesday which went well. Praise God... He is still in a lot of pain and will undergo another surgery soon... Please keep him in prayer. His condition is rather serious and has a lot of health complications... It's hard to think of what he's going through and none of us know why but one thing we know, that God is faithful and He knows, He's in control. It's incredible just seeing how his family is praising in the midst of the storm, not understanding why but continuing to trust in His goodness... It is truly living the Word that "you meant it for evil but God meant it for good". God is able to change any, every situation. His power works best in our weakness. His light shines the brightest in the darkness, only if we allow Him to.
Micah 7:7-8 - Therefore, I will look to the Lord; I will wait for the God of my salvation; My God will hear me. Do not rejoice over me, my enemy; When I fall, I will arise; When I sit in darkness, the Lord will be a light to me.
I can go on and on but this will suffice for now. Hope fills my heart. And it's because of Him.
As we enter the Holy Week, let us continue to reflect on His sacrifice and love for us.
A final thought: In my Philosophy class the other day (which I love), there was a debate on God and His goodness, as that was what we were covering that day. A non-believer said that she that God (if He existed) hasn't done anything for her and another concurred saying he hasn't seen God doing anything for him...
The only thing I thought of then was really? He DIED for you me, for us. And that's not just something, or anything, that's EVERYTHING. Oh, that our eyes would be open..
Isaiah 53:5 - But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was upon him, and by his wounds we are healed.
We ARE healed.
Peace and love.
Only a month left of school... The year's wrapping up quickly and this semester seems to be going by faster. Which also means I'm getting busier - its the time of the year, presentations, papers, more papers, exams, meetings, activities and the list goes on. Yet I'm still managing to find time in between to rest and I am utterly grateful. He doesn't want me to get lost in all of this but to continually draw strength from His presence and because of that, I am refreshed. I cannot speak enough of how wonderful it is to go about the day with the knowledge that He goes before me and holds me by the right hand. The reality of His promise is being realized as I grow closer and closer to Him.
It hasn't been an easy time for me, more so for the people I love. Benny, the Navs staff in our Christian Fellowship whom has become a really good friend and a spiritual mentor to me; we meet weekly to talk about what God has been doing and teaching us and pray together... I thoroughly enjoy our conversations and just learning from each other... Cindy, his wife is also close, I work under her in the International Students Office. They have been such an encouragement and blessing and I am so grateful for their presence in my life... Benny was admitted to the hospital last week and underwent a major surgery on Tuesday which went well. Praise God... He is still in a lot of pain and will undergo another surgery soon... Please keep him in prayer. His condition is rather serious and has a lot of health complications... It's hard to think of what he's going through and none of us know why but one thing we know, that God is faithful and He knows, He's in control. It's incredible just seeing how his family is praising in the midst of the storm, not understanding why but continuing to trust in His goodness... It is truly living the Word that "you meant it for evil but God meant it for good". God is able to change any, every situation. His power works best in our weakness. His light shines the brightest in the darkness, only if we allow Him to.
Micah 7:7-8 - Therefore, I will look to the Lord; I will wait for the God of my salvation; My God will hear me. Do not rejoice over me, my enemy; When I fall, I will arise; When I sit in darkness, the Lord will be a light to me.
I can go on and on but this will suffice for now. Hope fills my heart. And it's because of Him.
As we enter the Holy Week, let us continue to reflect on His sacrifice and love for us.
A final thought: In my Philosophy class the other day (which I love), there was a debate on God and His goodness, as that was what we were covering that day. A non-believer said that she that God (if He existed) hasn't done anything for her and another concurred saying he hasn't seen God doing anything for him...
The only thing I thought of then was really? He DIED for you me, for us. And that's not just something, or anything, that's EVERYTHING. Oh, that our eyes would be open..
Isaiah 53:5 - But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was upon him, and by his wounds we are healed.
We ARE healed.
Peace and love.
Wednesday, March 14, 2012
Grateful
Spring Break was amazing to say the least... Being with everyone at the Place of Promise once again was an experience I will remember for the rest of my life. This time around, I had more conversations and got to know the residents better and learned more about Him. There were stories that broke me, they all know what it means to suffer and some of them had such a horrible childhood it moved me to tears to see where they are now... Seeing God work in their lives is absolutely incredible. They give me more reason to love Him and know how real He is and for that I am grateful. And as for Beth, seeing how God has been using her to touch these people's lives... Its just incredible! All glory to God!
Beth drove a van up to drop me back in school with all the ladies... It was a rather emotional farewell, especially on my part. I will not see some or perhaps most of them again, cause even when I return next time (not sure when), they might have completed the program... But He comforted me.
On another note, I am extremely pleased with the weather. There was SOOOO much snow when we left for Spring Break, probably 1 feet or higher. And it looked as if it was going to stay... But it's been so nice these few days, in the 40s-60 (5-20 C) during the day. I am honestly not sure how I'm going to take the heat when I go back home... Been too used to this weather. But as people said, I've not experienced a real winter... Well, thank God then.
One thing I really took from being at the Place of Promise is the importance of having a reading time. The residents have to read in the mornings for an hour or two everyday and I usually sat in with them though I didn't really have to... Having undisturbed, quiet time to read was something that I haven't really had since college begun... The only books I read, aside from what I read for devotion, are those that are required for classes and I have so much on my reading list to catch up on... Really trying to cultivate this habit now. Not easy but possible if I set my mind to it and get my priorities right.
51 days till I fly home, can't wait! :)
Beth drove a van up to drop me back in school with all the ladies... It was a rather emotional farewell, especially on my part. I will not see some or perhaps most of them again, cause even when I return next time (not sure when), they might have completed the program... But He comforted me.
On another note, I am extremely pleased with the weather. There was SOOOO much snow when we left for Spring Break, probably 1 feet or higher. And it looked as if it was going to stay... But it's been so nice these few days, in the 40s-60 (5-20 C) during the day. I am honestly not sure how I'm going to take the heat when I go back home... Been too used to this weather. But as people said, I've not experienced a real winter... Well, thank God then.
One thing I really took from being at the Place of Promise is the importance of having a reading time. The residents have to read in the mornings for an hour or two everyday and I usually sat in with them though I didn't really have to... Having undisturbed, quiet time to read was something that I haven't really had since college begun... The only books I read, aside from what I read for devotion, are those that are required for classes and I have so much on my reading list to catch up on... Really trying to cultivate this habit now. Not easy but possible if I set my mind to it and get my priorities right.
51 days till I fly home, can't wait! :)
Friday, March 2, 2012
Back Again
Spring Break officially starts tomorrow but I left college today cause my class ended at 11. Beth (the director of the Place of Promise) came to pick me up at 1..
I'm here now, extremely excited to be here... Just a few hours in and I am loving it already.... It was so great to see everyone here again and I'm just anticipating what God wishes to do through me here... And also in the lives of these people. Lots of things happened (some rather drastic) since I left two months ago but its all good now... At least He knows whats really going on...
Just being here, watching God work in people's lives is a blessing. It's painful sometimes to listen to these people when they talk about their pain and helplessness.. At that moment you just wish you could help but there is really nothing you can do.. And I start to think, Lord, why? Why do these people have to have it so hard? But God is still God, He knows...
I heard a resident pray out loud during group today and I started tearing up. She was new when I came in the last time and she was not really interested in this whole God thing... But now she's stepped up to pray... What could be more beautiful?
The atmosphere is still rather unsettled sometimes, and only God's love can truly change this place. But I cannot deny the reality of His presence when I look at these people and see work in progress.... I look at myself and I see the same thing, we are all broken people who are in need for God whether we have had a history with drugs or alcohol or whatever it may be... We are all in need of His grace and mercy, we cannot go about on our own. I don't ever want to...
Grateful, just grateful. And I love Him more.
I'm here now, extremely excited to be here... Just a few hours in and I am loving it already.... It was so great to see everyone here again and I'm just anticipating what God wishes to do through me here... And also in the lives of these people. Lots of things happened (some rather drastic) since I left two months ago but its all good now... At least He knows whats really going on...
Just being here, watching God work in people's lives is a blessing. It's painful sometimes to listen to these people when they talk about their pain and helplessness.. At that moment you just wish you could help but there is really nothing you can do.. And I start to think, Lord, why? Why do these people have to have it so hard? But God is still God, He knows...
I heard a resident pray out loud during group today and I started tearing up. She was new when I came in the last time and she was not really interested in this whole God thing... But now she's stepped up to pray... What could be more beautiful?
The atmosphere is still rather unsettled sometimes, and only God's love can truly change this place. But I cannot deny the reality of His presence when I look at these people and see work in progress.... I look at myself and I see the same thing, we are all broken people who are in need for God whether we have had a history with drugs or alcohol or whatever it may be... We are all in need of His grace and mercy, we cannot go about on our own. I don't ever want to...
Grateful, just grateful. And I love Him more.
Friday, February 24, 2012
Here and There
Really looking forward to going home this summer. I like it here, I really do. But it feels like I've been away from home for too long... It's a weird feeling though.
Honestly, there are so many things to say, so many things that can be said...
On another note, Spring Break's in two weeks, really excited. Will be going back to the Place of Promise, miss all the people there!! And I'm excited about what God is going to do this time around :).
School work's been a lot as always... Won't complain though, cause compared to many of my friends, I have it much easier in terms of work load, definitely not easy classes!
Gospel choir concert at SNHU down at Manchester this Sunday, really pumped...
Been a crazy emotional week for me. Not in a bad sense, it was just weird having all of those emotions again after so long. Really feels different this time though. God has certainly done amazing things in my heart after all these years, reminding me time and again of His faithfulness and sufficiency. He's more than enough for me, definitely...
Till then.
Honestly, there are so many things to say, so many things that can be said...
On another note, Spring Break's in two weeks, really excited. Will be going back to the Place of Promise, miss all the people there!! And I'm excited about what God is going to do this time around :).
School work's been a lot as always... Won't complain though, cause compared to many of my friends, I have it much easier in terms of work load, definitely not easy classes!
Gospel choir concert at SNHU down at Manchester this Sunday, really pumped...
Been a crazy emotional week for me. Not in a bad sense, it was just weird having all of those emotions again after so long. Really feels different this time though. God has certainly done amazing things in my heart after all these years, reminding me time and again of His faithfulness and sufficiency. He's more than enough for me, definitely...
Till then.
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