Uncertainties - Nothing to Fear

I have a waiting list of things to blog about. But that will all come later..

I was just thinking about how I've been so set on the plans I had for the future. In Form 4, I had my sights set on doing a Diploma in Mass Communication in Singapore.. And that was it. No other plan. Right up to the beginning of this year, where I wanted to further my studies overseas, namely in Japan or Korea.. Probably to do Mass Comm over there under scholarship. And that was what I wanted..

Right now, things have just changed. I don't have the same dreams anymore.. I always wanted to get out of this country to further studies.. But God has a purpose for me here.. And until He moves, I don't want to.. If you ask me what I want to do in the future, I honestly don't know.. All I know is that I want to live a life that glorifies Him, even in the career that's before me.. I don't know what subjects to take when I go to college.. I don't know what's to happen. I don't know what He wants me to be. I don't know ANYTHING. The only thing I know is that I just have to continue to seek Him.. Is there anything else I can do? Relying on my own wisdom and strength would cause me serious trouble.. And there isn't anything else I want to do now than to do His will..

You would probably ask; don't you have your desires, hopes.. something that you want to be? Maybe I do after all, but it all means nothing when compared to living for His glory..

There's nothing greater than living for Him..

Short Update

Have been so lazy to update my blog. Anyway, camp was exactly one week ago. Will post details up another day. Few of the campers have done a good job blogging bout camp.

Now that camp is over, I'm really missing it and all the preparations for it as well. The week before it was even more stressful than SPM. And there were even friends who said that I looked really stressed up prior to the camp. But somehow, He had it all under control. More about His faithfulness in the next post. Applications to do etc. Really miss you campers! Thanks for all the LAME jokes and stuff you guys did. Though I didn't really have the time to sit down and talk to you all, I'm glad to see the happy smiles on your faces. =). And yes, I mean all of you.

God bless and till then!

Your faithfulness, reaches to the skies

Very Glad

I have ALOT of things to blog about right now but that will all come later. The thing is, today is one of the Happiest days of my life. I am serious. And probably the happiest so far. Talk about how a game changes your mood =D.

Those of you who know me would get what I mean. You can read about it in my alternate blog. If you know what that is. Haha

Out.

Weary Hearts, Take Note.

So as they say, 'Tomorrow's the day'.

Just yesterday, I read some of my MSN contacts personal message and they claimed that Doomsday is coming... I sighed at that because if only they knew what Doomsday really will be, tomorrow is NOT even a Trillion Gazillion times close..

I know it might be just a usage of words to describe what they feel, but it's just so wrong... I cannot imagine how it could be doomsday, how it could actually be the end of your life.. Is your life really over if you don't get the results you want/you studied for?? Maybe not everyone is that extreme, but to go into depression is no use.. I don't want to seem as if I don't care, cause it is important I know. For the future.. But if we all could see it in such a way, that it isn't the end, and that it does not really determine the life you are going to live, it could make all the difference..

To be honest, I'm not really worried bout it. It's not because I did very well, far from that really. I do not have high expectations. I can't even imagine what will happen.. But all of these are so small and unimportant when I compare it to the joy that comes from serving Him.. One day, you will come to realize that all these things will mean nothing and when the world fades away, you will have nothing left if Christ isn't in you. It's important to excel in the things we do, but how easily we forget the reason we want to excel, which is to glorify Christ. It's good if we can do our best and get good results. But even if we don't, it's not the end. On this earth, disappointments and setbacks are only normal, and vital for our growth.. It's how we respond to them that really makes us who we are.

In conclusion, I'm just trying to point out, that there is absolutely no point getting worked out or worried about these things. It's true that worry is natural. But it doesn't mean not worrying isn't something we cannot achieve.. Trust in the Lord and He will guide you. He isn't looking for people who are striving to be the best they can, but He's looking for hearts that will have complete trust and faith in Him knowing that in whatever circumstance, God is in control.. For He is God. And it is only normal that we should give our lives to Him..

Whatever happens Lord, I just want to live for You, for Your glory..

Psalm 62: 7-8 - My victory and honor come from God alone. He is my refuge, a rock where no enemy can reach me. O my people, trust in Him at all times. Pour out your heart to Him, for God is our refuge.

The Mind Speaks

Only read on if you don't mind not understanding a single thing I'm talking about..

This is one of the rare occasions (ever since the year begun) where I'm having lots of thoughts.

I'm not doubting. (nothing to do with faith, mind you). I'm not losing hope.. I'm not losing my mind either. But just thinking bout how long it's been makes me wonder if things will ever be the same. 17 days now, and still ongoing. I'm not gonna let these stupid thoughts take over and ruin everything.. I have to be patient. I have to wait. I have to start trusting.

But the truth is, I'm not sure anymore.

He is faithful

And always has been. Back after a week. Modem got struck by lightning on Friday and couldn't go online for the past few days. Bought a new one and there was so problem with the settings but its alright now. And I'm glad to say that I can survive without the internet. =).

Oh, and I retook my driving test today in both parts.. And He brought me through it and I managed to pass. The tester I got was the complete opposite of the woman that day. It was a guy this time and he was a nice person. Skip the details. But through this experience I have learnt many things.. And one of it is that when we go through trials, and failures.. We naturally tend to ask God 'Why'?. Why me? Why did You ever let me go through this?.. However, we shouldn't be asking Why but What.. What do You want me to learn through this? It pleases the Father that His child would not doubt His authority but trusts Him completely.. When Christ is in the Driver's seat, we should just stay put and not help Him, but trust in Him fully that He will drive us safely through the journey.

There is something to learn from everything that happens. It just takes faith to believe.