Thursday, April 28, 2011

going away

After much prayer and discussion with my parents, I've decided to accept Colby-Sawyer's offer and will be going there at the end of August. I've deposited and officially am a CSC student Class of 2015. Making the decision wasn't easy. Although it was the only door that was clearly open for me, I was still apprehensive about deciding too quickly because I wanted to really make sure it was Him who opened the door. So how did I know He did? Well for one, I can't say that He showed a really obvious sign that says GO. But His leading in our lives aren't always clear-cut, we've got to seek Him and know where He's bringing us. Through the little things along the way and especially the fact that we're all at peace with it, I'm taking this leap of faith.

Why leap of faith you ask me?

The idea of going to a foreign country to further studies is intriguing. But at what expense? Leaving my family, friends and basically everything I know behind and going to a new place is kinda scary. But I'm not gripped by fear just yet, because I know He will go with me.
Also, the States are becoming a more godless nation and more and more people are turning away from God. Not to mention the lifestyle there is completely different with temptations lurking at every corner. I told Him before, that if He knew it would be too great for me to withstand, don't lead me there. Because if my faith is going to be shaken, I'd rather not go. I'd rather die before that ever happens. No joke. The thought of me being far away from Him scares me.

But then again, I was reminded;
Psalm 119:9 - How can a young man keep his way pure? By living according to your word.

He speaks.

My trust is in Him and not in my own strength. There are many uncertainties; questions about what if I don't maintain the required CGPA to keep my merit scholarship, funding and settling down, finding the right church etc. Whatever they may be, I choose not to allow it to bother me, but that they may lead me back to Him. It's all in His hands. If He led me to it, He will lead me through it. He's a faithful God, no doubt about that.

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