Monday, April 6, 2009

No Regrets

13 October 2008:

"Lord my heart is broken... into a million pieces, I can't fix it, I give it to You right now. You are my EVERYTHING. You are my ALL in ALL. I love You Lord."

Psalm 38:9-10, 15, 21 - All my longings lie open before you, O Lord; my sighing is not hidden from You. My heart pounds, my strength fails me; even the light has gone from my eyes... I wait for You, O Lord; you will answer, o Lord my God. Do not abandon me, O Lord. Do not stand at a distance, my God. Come quickly to help me, O Lord my Saviour.

"How do I move on?" "Hold on to Me."

Looking back at the past, I struggled deep inside. There were times where thoughts of guilt and worthlessness came in.. The things that happened crippled me from believing that I am precious in His sight.. Yet I knew that I was.. Such confusing, painful times.. I could never understand why He allowed such things... I told Him I couldn't but He said He could..

Months later, He set me free. The past no longer affected me. Thoughts of worthlessness went away.. There was no definite answer why He allowed me to go through it all.. But one thing I know; it was all worth it.. Without going through the pain, I would never learn and thus never grow in Him.. I might have made mistakes but I have no regrets.. Holding on to Him all the while as He continued to shower me with His love.. There was never a moment He wasn't there.. And because of it all, I grew closer to Him.. Is there anything more I would want than to know Him more? I thank Him for every experience.. And I know there's more to come..

Right now, I've come to the point where I'm beginning to see that His will is ever pleasing, perfect and good.. And I thank God for bringing certain people into my life right now.. I don't know why I never realized it before.. But thanks; alot.. =) (hope you know who you are..)

Lord prepare me, to be a sanctuary.
Pure and holy, tried and true.
With thanksgiving, I'll be a living,
Sanctuary for You.

For how could the created one know more than the Creator?

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