How would you know when your heart is healed? Even if it were healed completely; there'd still be scars to remind you. Maybe we shouldn't try to run away from the pain; but face it.
6 weeks have passed; I guess it's healing; but the scar still remains.
I never tried to run away. I only prayed for sufficient strength to carry through. But it was through the tears and moments where I felt helpless; I felt His arms around me; comforting and reminding me of His everlasting love that will never fail. This emptiness inside can only be filled by His love. That, I didn't forget.
It ended; before it even started; I lost a battle I never was a part of. It hurt me to think of the endless possibilities; of what could've been, what should've been; what would've been. I was glad to know that I was on the right track. Give it some time. And then everything fell apart. It wasn't easy to deal with the pain of shattered hopes. I wondered why it hurt so much. Now I understand.
It doesn't hurt as much anymore. But I know I've got a long way to go before you slip out of my life. I'm still holding on to the memories; it's the only thing I've got. Sometimes I still do wish things had been different... Sometimes I still hope for that one in a million chance. It pains me when they say it's not worth it. What do they know? Am I supposed to act like it doesn't affect me when deep inside; it's hurting so badly? Am I supposed to rejoice when I hear all the stories that give me good reason not to be affected?
Of late; I've been trying to keep myself busy. Reading; watching shows; doing this and that.. Have I been trying so hard to keep it out of my mind? Cause I've realized; when I turn off the lights; it's you I think about.
I know I could say we're through
And tell myself I'm over you
But even if I made a vow
I promise not to miss you now
And try to hide the truth inside
I'd fail cause I, I just can't live a lie
You're my Healer.
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